Your Responsibilities
There is no question that if you have already sexually touched your own or someone else’s child you have a responsibility to let his/her parents or caregivers know so they can takes steps to help the child. The barriers to this are understandably powerful, for example:
· the likelihood of confrontation
· the risk of physical attack to you, your family or property
· exposure for you and your family
· the possibility of arrest and conviction
· potential breakdown of your family relationships
· loss of employment and reputation
· damage to friendships and social standing
These barriers are based on fear, but there are equally powerful barriers based on indifference to the child’s welfare or your responsibilities, and enjoyment of ‘getting away with it’, ‘getting one over on the parents’ or control of the child. If your primary barriers are based on indifference or enjoyment then it is possible that your motivation to stop will come with being caught and facing punishment.
If you feel you do want to stop now, but recognise a bit of indifference or enjoyment as barriers to telling someone, that’s ok as long as your responsible self is the greeter influence. If you have negative thoughts about yourself, this is a chance to change your identity to someone who has done the right thing in relation to child-sex.
TOP TIP: Make a list of who you believe you are responsible to (for instance, the child(ren), their parents/caregivers, your family…). For each person, make a note of why you feel responsible to them. Then make a list in each case of any barriers to telling them. Incorporate this list into your motivations and action plan.
© Chris Willoughby 2008-
